Working on a Jonah birthday post, promise! I cannot believe my baby turned TWO yesterday. Wowee.
We had a small party for him - most people couldn't make it last minute, but it was still an enjoyable time filled with (an appropraite amount of :) presents, banana cupcakes, the sounds of children laughing and harmonicas... good times.
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
I have absolutely no idea what to write.
There. I said it.
Lordy knows I have plenty to write about, but there is little relevance for you, my dear readers. And little coherency in my brain.
As a matter of fact, I'm fairly certain those last sentences may or may not make sense.
My life is just me, running from cleaning houses in the morn to Panera in the afternoon and evening on a Saturday. It's me, doing the mommy thing (reading to my babies, laundering mountains upon mountains of clothes, kissing ouchies, making food, cuddling). It's me, going to bed at midnight and waking up at 5, just because the house is continually creaking with its to-dos. It's me, not showering for two days in a row (more or less). It's all very un-glamorous, but hey, life isn't about glamor. It's about seasons that expand, mature, weed out, test... And this is one such season. A season of slapping high-five to my husband as he comes home and I go.
Blech.
I wish real life had spring break :) Or that banks would forgive debt like God did (and does). How much purer this life could be if everyone just extended grace and understanding to everyone, hm?
There. I said it.
Lordy knows I have plenty to write about, but there is little relevance for you, my dear readers. And little coherency in my brain.
As a matter of fact, I'm fairly certain those last sentences may or may not make sense.
My life is just me, running from cleaning houses in the morn to Panera in the afternoon and evening on a Saturday. It's me, doing the mommy thing (reading to my babies, laundering mountains upon mountains of clothes, kissing ouchies, making food, cuddling). It's me, going to bed at midnight and waking up at 5, just because the house is continually creaking with its to-dos. It's me, not showering for two days in a row (more or less). It's all very un-glamorous, but hey, life isn't about glamor. It's about seasons that expand, mature, weed out, test... And this is one such season. A season of slapping high-five to my husband as he comes home and I go.
Blech.
I wish real life had spring break :) Or that banks would forgive debt like God did (and does). How much purer this life could be if everyone just extended grace and understanding to everyone, hm?
Friday, October 28, 2011
my SECOND first official night at panera
In lieu of, you know, not having money, Jonathan had applied for a second job at a local Blockbuster. Long story short: after a rigorous FIVE WEEK LONG interview (no joke) he was *finally* hired......... for minimum wage.
A 26 year old.... college graduate..... minimum wage..... Wah wah waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.
Totally NOT wanting to sound snotty in an economy where people are jumping through bigger hoops for pay such as this, but HELLOOOO. Working for that little for as many hours as he would be every week would not even make up our monthly deficit, and would just end up stressin' the McCrackin' out of my sweet hubs. So, no. It was not good.
So. Jonathan got off the phone, told me this tidbit of sunshine, and I said, "Hells no! You're going to drive me around town, and I am going to talk to managers and I'm going to get a job TODAY, dammit!" I actually didn't say it this crassly, but I sure as hell and brimstone felt like it.
As if I could not drive myself, my loving husband toted me about Pewaukee. First I walked into Starbucks, which is practically right next to our apartment. The awesome barista with some schweet dreadlocks said that they weren't hiring, and that I wouldn't want to work there anyway because the pay was crap and the hours were, too. Bummer. But then, in a moment of distraction, we went on to have a wonderful conversation (over a pumpkin spice latte) about her dreadlocks. Her insight into one of the most beautiful hair styles EVER and my yummy latte were worth the 'not hiring' verdict.
After I pulled myself away from the magnanimous dreadlocked coffee lady, Jonathan and I drove over to Costco. They weren't open. Drat.
Finally, we drove to Panera.
Now see, I worked for a Panera back in the day (um, 2 1/2 years ago) when we lived in Grand Rapids. It was great. The people were amazing. The customers were sweet and generous and grace-filled (for the most part). I've always loved Panera's bread... and paninis.... and coffee.... and everything else. I've never minded polo shirts or aprons. And, I had left the G-Rap Panera on such good terms (and with an associate trainer status, no less) that I thought, geesh! I'll be a shoe-in!
And you know what? God be praised, I was.
I asked to speak with a manager and was introduced to Steve. When he found out I had been an associate trainer, his mouth basically dropped to the floor and his eyes lit up like a cinnamon crunch bagel catching ablaze in the toaster. He asked to interview me, right then and there, and hired me shortly thereafter.
And for more than minimum wage. Awesome sauce.
Jonathan was so relived. I, too, was relieved, and excited about working again (especially with flexible hours that would enable me to still clean Mija's house on Saturdays, and be with my boys throughout the day - M-F 5:30-9, Sat. 2:30-9).
All that said, here I am. Sitting on the couch after my first official day "back on the job." Everyone I worked with was friendly and helpful. I didn't work a really long shift, so I feel like it is totally doable, as far a stress is concerned. I don't have to take any work home, or agonize about this and that. It's bagels, for Pete's sake. It was like riding a bike, though there are a ton of new products I have to learn about... and taste test, you know.
So much Wii Fit.
A 26 year old.... college graduate..... minimum wage..... Wah wah waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.
Totally NOT wanting to sound snotty in an economy where people are jumping through bigger hoops for pay such as this, but HELLOOOO. Working for that little for as many hours as he would be every week would not even make up our monthly deficit, and would just end up stressin' the McCrackin' out of my sweet hubs. So, no. It was not good.
So. Jonathan got off the phone, told me this tidbit of sunshine, and I said, "Hells no! You're going to drive me around town, and I am going to talk to managers and I'm going to get a job TODAY, dammit!" I actually didn't say it this crassly, but I sure as hell and brimstone felt like it.
As if I could not drive myself, my loving husband toted me about Pewaukee. First I walked into Starbucks, which is practically right next to our apartment. The awesome barista with some schweet dreadlocks said that they weren't hiring, and that I wouldn't want to work there anyway because the pay was crap and the hours were, too. Bummer. But then, in a moment of distraction, we went on to have a wonderful conversation (over a pumpkin spice latte) about her dreadlocks. Her insight into one of the most beautiful hair styles EVER and my yummy latte were worth the 'not hiring' verdict.
After I pulled myself away from the magnanimous dreadlocked coffee lady, Jonathan and I drove over to Costco. They weren't open. Drat.
Finally, we drove to Panera.
Now see, I worked for a Panera back in the day (um, 2 1/2 years ago) when we lived in Grand Rapids. It was great. The people were amazing. The customers were sweet and generous and grace-filled (for the most part). I've always loved Panera's bread... and paninis.... and coffee.... and everything else. I've never minded polo shirts or aprons. And, I had left the G-Rap Panera on such good terms (and with an associate trainer status, no less) that I thought, geesh! I'll be a shoe-in!
And you know what? God be praised, I was.
I asked to speak with a manager and was introduced to Steve. When he found out I had been an associate trainer, his mouth basically dropped to the floor and his eyes lit up like a cinnamon crunch bagel catching ablaze in the toaster. He asked to interview me, right then and there, and hired me shortly thereafter.
And for more than minimum wage. Awesome sauce.
Jonathan was so relived. I, too, was relieved, and excited about working again (especially with flexible hours that would enable me to still clean Mija's house on Saturdays, and be with my boys throughout the day - M-F 5:30-9, Sat. 2:30-9).
All that said, here I am. Sitting on the couch after my first official day "back on the job." Everyone I worked with was friendly and helpful. I didn't work a really long shift, so I feel like it is totally doable, as far a stress is concerned. I don't have to take any work home, or agonize about this and that. It's bagels, for Pete's sake. It was like riding a bike, though there are a ton of new products I have to learn about... and taste test, you know.
So much Wii Fit.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
one piece of my/ His art
My friend Caitlin turned me onto painting Scripture verses on canvas. It's pretty much awesome.
Above, is a slight adaptation of Colossians 3:15a. It will serve as a Blessing to people as they enter our home, and then again as they leave. I wanted to put it above our doorway, but it looked super-bulky. It will go on our bookshelf... as soon as we can afford a good bookshelf :)
I had acquired this pretty-colored, but run-of-the-mill, piece of wall art and never knew what to do with it. Until now. I took the art, some Helvetica printed bold letter stickers, and some white paint, and BAM - something cool, right?!
Also up the drainpipe, I have three horizontally placed canvases, painted in a creamy latte color, ready to receive Romans 12:12 on them (rejoice in hope, constant in prayer, patient in tribulation). Those canvases will go on our dining room wall.
Then I have two more canvases, one painted fiery orange and the other cerulean, for the boy's life verses.
I am a painting machine!
The painting alone is such a good outlet for stress, and at the same time I am hiding God's word in my heart. 1, 2 PUNCH.
one more thing...
Jonah has been coloring up a storm lately, which makes me SO happy. It was always a question with the therapists - Is he holding crayons yet?? Is he coloring at all? Is he showing any interest in coloring....???
And I continually worried because the answer to those questions was always, hmmm, um, sorta... not really.
But, praise to the Lord, Jonah's hit a coloring stride that I am over-joyful about. He loves coloring books or just plain old paper. His main heartthrob, however, is the wooden easel and chalk board. The dude just adores chalk. You can always tell he's been hard at work when there are rings of dusty blue, red, or green around his cheeks and his hands.
This morning, he was coloring with pencils. With each stroke, he paused and wanted me to praise him. If I didn't recognize his artistic genius immediately, he would scream. That was kinda ridiculous... but wonderful at the same time. I'm glad he's becoming that passionate about something (other than breastfeeding, of course :)
Getting pumped up! He looooves his easel!
Big, swoopy lines.
Time to start afresh....
My favorite part is when he erases it all and begins again. What determination!
And I continually worried because the answer to those questions was always, hmmm, um, sorta... not really.
But, praise to the Lord, Jonah's hit a coloring stride that I am over-joyful about. He loves coloring books or just plain old paper. His main heartthrob, however, is the wooden easel and chalk board. The dude just adores chalk. You can always tell he's been hard at work when there are rings of dusty blue, red, or green around his cheeks and his hands.
This morning, he was coloring with pencils. With each stroke, he paused and wanted me to praise him. If I didn't recognize his artistic genius immediately, he would scream. That was kinda ridiculous... but wonderful at the same time. I'm glad he's becoming that passionate about something (other than breastfeeding, of course :)
Getting pumped up! He looooves his easel!
Big, swoopy lines.
Time to start afresh....
My favorite part is when he erases it all and begins again. What determination!Tuesday, October 25, 2011
quick update on life in wisconi
1. I just joined Pinterest. I have no idea what the hub-bub is about... and I THRIVE on visual. Could someone please explain the appeal to me?
2. Jonathan and I just started doing Wii Fit, in earnest. I'm going to be svelte in no time, you can bet your bottom dollar.
3. Tomorrow is my first chiropractic visit in the past 20 years. My parents took me all the time when I was young, because I would have such terrible asthmatic episodes. The chiropractor helped a ton, and now, sporting my post baby bod, I'm sure he'll be able to help some more. I have to get my body realigned something fierce, a thought that flowed through my groggy brain as two little boys (who shall remain nameless) jumped all over me this afternoon...
4. So. I am working at Panera! And nannying a couple days a week! And cleaning Mija's more often! And still selling Mary Kay and Young Living Essential Oils! And.... Actually, despite the upswing in busyness, I feel very sane, very peaceful. The house is in a bit of disaray and my children might starve from time to time (kidding) but all in all, I am thankful for the opportunities to work and help supplement income. We might actually survive.... :) Praise the heavens!
5. Elijah is getting BIG. Like, I looked at him today and had to do a double-take. He talks. A lot. He eats. A lot. This kid has more energy than anyone else I know. He is crazy-artistic, coloring in the lines, creating with clay and blocks, imagining all sorts of Dr. Seuss-ish type stuff. Today, he told me: "I wanna omblet for breakfast, with poorple peppahs." I just about hopped into the car to get some purple peppers, I tell ya. Cute.
6. Likewise, Jonah is growing, sprout-style. He still uses crawling as his primary mode of transportation, but cruising more than ever. He "reads" avidly. He is intensely aware of his surroundings. He is able to point out body parts, and recognize animals and their sounds (for the most part :). Oh, my little spud! I looooove you so.
7. I have been painting and crafting a ton lately. Will post pictures soon - what a wonderful outlet *that* has been for me in moments of stress.
8. Jonathan is the love of my life. He's making me laugh right now with his silly antics. That's my lover - always bringing a smile to my lips, a warmth to my soul.
9. Speaking of smiles - We had friends over for dinner the other night. After we had eaten, the mother stepped into the hallway to change her baby's diaper, and Elijah noticed. He walked over, leaned over, and stated, "Ah, she's a girl, so she doesn't have a penis. But I DO have a penis. Ima boy." Thanks for the bio lesson, son! :)
10. Chinese Pear candles from World Market are probably the most beautiful smelling things on the planet earth. No joke. Next time you're in WM, try them. And also, pick up some Italian dark chocolate. Mmmm.
2. Jonathan and I just started doing Wii Fit, in earnest. I'm going to be svelte in no time, you can bet your bottom dollar.
3. Tomorrow is my first chiropractic visit in the past 20 years. My parents took me all the time when I was young, because I would have such terrible asthmatic episodes. The chiropractor helped a ton, and now, sporting my post baby bod, I'm sure he'll be able to help some more. I have to get my body realigned something fierce, a thought that flowed through my groggy brain as two little boys (who shall remain nameless) jumped all over me this afternoon...
4. So. I am working at Panera! And nannying a couple days a week! And cleaning Mija's more often! And still selling Mary Kay and Young Living Essential Oils! And.... Actually, despite the upswing in busyness, I feel very sane, very peaceful. The house is in a bit of disaray and my children might starve from time to time (kidding) but all in all, I am thankful for the opportunities to work and help supplement income. We might actually survive.... :) Praise the heavens!
5. Elijah is getting BIG. Like, I looked at him today and had to do a double-take. He talks. A lot. He eats. A lot. This kid has more energy than anyone else I know. He is crazy-artistic, coloring in the lines, creating with clay and blocks, imagining all sorts of Dr. Seuss-ish type stuff. Today, he told me: "I wanna omblet for breakfast, with poorple peppahs." I just about hopped into the car to get some purple peppers, I tell ya. Cute.
6. Likewise, Jonah is growing, sprout-style. He still uses crawling as his primary mode of transportation, but cruising more than ever. He "reads" avidly. He is intensely aware of his surroundings. He is able to point out body parts, and recognize animals and their sounds (for the most part :). Oh, my little spud! I looooove you so.
7. I have been painting and crafting a ton lately. Will post pictures soon - what a wonderful outlet *that* has been for me in moments of stress.
8. Jonathan is the love of my life. He's making me laugh right now with his silly antics. That's my lover - always bringing a smile to my lips, a warmth to my soul.
9. Speaking of smiles - We had friends over for dinner the other night. After we had eaten, the mother stepped into the hallway to change her baby's diaper, and Elijah noticed. He walked over, leaned over, and stated, "Ah, she's a girl, so she doesn't have a penis. But I DO have a penis. Ima boy." Thanks for the bio lesson, son! :)
10. Chinese Pear candles from World Market are probably the most beautiful smelling things on the planet earth. No joke. Next time you're in WM, try them. And also, pick up some Italian dark chocolate. Mmmm.
Monday, October 17, 2011
the day of october 17
Greatly inspired title, hmm?
It's one of those perfect fall days. Cool breeze, warm sunlight, and that distinct autumn leaves scent that I love so much. Ah. Guess who's kickin' back with a homemade chai right now as the little ones slumber?
One guess....
Ok. It's me.
"Hey, God? Your creation of fall?? Yeah, thank you. 'Tis good indeed! Ya did swell."
The Butrin household has many gourds all about: some on the balcony, some in the boy's room, some in front of our door with a big pot of amber-hued mums. Big, bumpy orange pumpkins and little, twisty yellow-green gourds. One gourd, in particular, Jonah loves sucking on (I think because it sorta looks like a breast.... ha!) A few of the pumpkins are for making into pies and a couple are strictly for gutting and harvesting seeds and making into misshapen Jacks (you try making Jack-o-Lanterns with a dull butcher knife and see how YOURS turn out!)
On our most recent trip to the farm, in addition to the pumpkins, we picked up a half-gallon of organic apple cider, a small bag of locally popped kettle corn, McIntosh's (my favorite apples), and a couple butternut and acorn squashes. Yippee for harvest in Wisconi!
Is it funny how proud I was for Elijah when he bypassed all the standard orange pumpkins and picked out for himself a really pretty light yellowish one with dark green stripes? Elijah's independence is so striking to me, more so than ever before. I love watching him employ his own methods and finding what he wants. What a little... person!... this babe is turning out to be :) What happened to my small, wrinkly, totally dependent, red-headed baby-bean?
Elijah's shorter hair! And Jonah, for as precious and beautiful as he is, looks totally stung out here (and according to the mess on his shirt, it's probably a sunbutter hangover). But this's all I got right now.
Elijah: "Jo-jo, you like the pumpkin I picked out for you!?" Jonah: "Eh, it's a'ight. Next year though, can you grab me one of those funk-a-delic turban pumpkins? K'Thanks."
It's one of those perfect fall days. Cool breeze, warm sunlight, and that distinct autumn leaves scent that I love so much. Ah. Guess who's kickin' back with a homemade chai right now as the little ones slumber?
One guess....
Ok. It's me.
"Hey, God? Your creation of fall?? Yeah, thank you. 'Tis good indeed! Ya did swell."
The Butrin household has many gourds all about: some on the balcony, some in the boy's room, some in front of our door with a big pot of amber-hued mums. Big, bumpy orange pumpkins and little, twisty yellow-green gourds. One gourd, in particular, Jonah loves sucking on (I think because it sorta looks like a breast.... ha!) A few of the pumpkins are for making into pies and a couple are strictly for gutting and harvesting seeds and making into misshapen Jacks (you try making Jack-o-Lanterns with a dull butcher knife and see how YOURS turn out!)
On our most recent trip to the farm, in addition to the pumpkins, we picked up a half-gallon of organic apple cider, a small bag of locally popped kettle corn, McIntosh's (my favorite apples), and a couple butternut and acorn squashes. Yippee for harvest in Wisconi!
Is it funny how proud I was for Elijah when he bypassed all the standard orange pumpkins and picked out for himself a really pretty light yellowish one with dark green stripes? Elijah's independence is so striking to me, more so than ever before. I love watching him employ his own methods and finding what he wants. What a little... person!... this babe is turning out to be :) What happened to my small, wrinkly, totally dependent, red-headed baby-bean?
Elijah's shorter hair! And Jonah, for as precious and beautiful as he is, looks totally stung out here (and according to the mess on his shirt, it's probably a sunbutter hangover). But this's all I got right now.
Elijah: "Jo-jo, you like the pumpkin I picked out for you!?" Jonah: "Eh, it's a'ight. Next year though, can you grab me one of those funk-a-delic turban pumpkins? K'Thanks."Thursday, October 6, 2011
little thoughts on doula/ recipes!
Jonathan very sweetly offered to put the boys down to bed tonight so that I could pop out for some R&R. I went to Caribou Coffee, laptop and birthing books in tow, and set up camp for a couple hours.
Coffee, quiet, and birth. Tres manifique.
My dear friends, Michelle and Jonathan, are expecting their first baby in March, and they have graciously asked if I would be their doula!!!!!!!!(lots of exclamations)!!!!!!!! I cannot even begin to relay what an honor it was and is to be asked to fill this role. I feel immensely proud and ecstatic, over-the-moon. My very first birth as a doula (unofficial, but still :). Yeah. Doula workshop is on hold until the spring... when tax season rolls around... bleh.
I am equipping myself: writing up thoughts, reading like mad, and - of course - collaborating with Mama Shelly. It's neat: I feel, hmm, at home with all this. Like, I've found my niche.
Aside from the Holy Word, there is absolutely *nothing* more I would rather pore over than birthy literature. I love hearing from Michelle: how she's feeling, what she's thinking, what questions I can help answer. I love, love being there for her - she's one of my best friends, and this is an incredibly unique and special time for her. To be a small part of that makes me get all warm-fuzzy like.
Mmm! So excited for her! So excited for Jon! So excited for their babe! She's totally having a boy.... I feel that "boy" aura all over when we're near. Oh yeah. Scientific assessments here.
So, I'll write more about my side of this journey as time floats on.
In the meantime.....
Booyah, check out these recipes:
I was cleaning for Mija one early Saturday, and they were whipping up a treat for the Lord's Day - "chocoalte pudding". Get this: it's avocado, dates, and cocoa or carob powder. Ta-freakin-da! Isn't that nuts!?! Mija had me try a taste, and I went through the roof. It was scrump-didli-umptious. Try it - you shouldn't be disappointed, and if you are, then your taste-buds need a readjustment... I kid, I kid. But seriously - TRY IT.
Secondly, I found this lovely gem through trusty ol' Facebook: Poor Girl Eats Well. Her garlic-parmesan soba noodles were just what my family needed the other day. Again - scrumptious! Recently, she's been posting different types of taco recipes - all look phenomenal. I've even tried my hand at her recipe for strawberry-peach ice cream - made WITHOUT an ice cream maker. Bonus. It was heaven on a spoon, peeps.
Then there was this, which (for future reference) if anyone ever stumbles upon another recipe that has quinoa, kale, AND feta cheese in it, please do not hesitate to call me up and let me know. I am a gosh darn sucker for those heavenly foodstuffs. The dish itself was hearty, warm to the soul, flavorful. Absolute crowd-pleaser.
I enjoy pretending like I'm an award-winning chef sometimes - even going as far as talking to myself (er, like there's a live audience or something...) Anyway, that was a totally random confession! I've whipped up a couple yummy things myself in the past month, including fruit smoothies, herb butters, turkey meatballs, curried tater tots (Trader Joe's tater tots are unlike any other tot I've ever popped into my mouth - crunchy, textured, free of anything crappy - truly something in the realm of tater tots - I just add a dash of curry, and voila - awesomeness factor kicked up a bagillion points). I've reinvented fontina cheese and button mushroom quesadillas, and homemade pita pockets with marinara, spinach chicken sausage, and illegal amounts of organic mozzarella.
Oh yes, if you have to ask - my boys DO love me *blush*.
Hope some of these recipes tickle your fancy. Enjoy cooking and eating!
Coffee, quiet, and birth. Tres manifique.
My dear friends, Michelle and Jonathan, are expecting their first baby in March, and they have graciously asked if I would be their doula!!!!!!!!(lots of exclamations)!!!!!!!! I cannot even begin to relay what an honor it was and is to be asked to fill this role. I feel immensely proud and ecstatic, over-the-moon. My very first birth as a doula (unofficial, but still :). Yeah. Doula workshop is on hold until the spring... when tax season rolls around... bleh.
I am equipping myself: writing up thoughts, reading like mad, and - of course - collaborating with Mama Shelly. It's neat: I feel, hmm, at home with all this. Like, I've found my niche.
Aside from the Holy Word, there is absolutely *nothing* more I would rather pore over than birthy literature. I love hearing from Michelle: how she's feeling, what she's thinking, what questions I can help answer. I love, love being there for her - she's one of my best friends, and this is an incredibly unique and special time for her. To be a small part of that makes me get all warm-fuzzy like.
Mmm! So excited for her! So excited for Jon! So excited for their babe! She's totally having a boy.... I feel that "boy" aura all over when we're near. Oh yeah. Scientific assessments here.
So, I'll write more about my side of this journey as time floats on.
In the meantime.....
Booyah, check out these recipes:
I was cleaning for Mija one early Saturday, and they were whipping up a treat for the Lord's Day - "chocoalte pudding". Get this: it's avocado, dates, and cocoa or carob powder. Ta-freakin-da! Isn't that nuts!?! Mija had me try a taste, and I went through the roof. It was scrump-didli-umptious. Try it - you shouldn't be disappointed, and if you are, then your taste-buds need a readjustment... I kid, I kid. But seriously - TRY IT.
Secondly, I found this lovely gem through trusty ol' Facebook: Poor Girl Eats Well. Her garlic-parmesan soba noodles were just what my family needed the other day. Again - scrumptious! Recently, she's been posting different types of taco recipes - all look phenomenal. I've even tried my hand at her recipe for strawberry-peach ice cream - made WITHOUT an ice cream maker. Bonus. It was heaven on a spoon, peeps.
Then there was this, which (for future reference) if anyone ever stumbles upon another recipe that has quinoa, kale, AND feta cheese in it, please do not hesitate to call me up and let me know. I am a gosh darn sucker for those heavenly foodstuffs. The dish itself was hearty, warm to the soul, flavorful. Absolute crowd-pleaser.
I enjoy pretending like I'm an award-winning chef sometimes - even going as far as talking to myself (er, like there's a live audience or something...) Anyway, that was a totally random confession! I've whipped up a couple yummy things myself in the past month, including fruit smoothies, herb butters, turkey meatballs, curried tater tots (Trader Joe's tater tots are unlike any other tot I've ever popped into my mouth - crunchy, textured, free of anything crappy - truly something in the realm of tater tots - I just add a dash of curry, and voila - awesomeness factor kicked up a bagillion points). I've reinvented fontina cheese and button mushroom quesadillas, and homemade pita pockets with marinara, spinach chicken sausage, and illegal amounts of organic mozzarella.
Oh yes, if you have to ask - my boys DO love me *blush*.
Hope some of these recipes tickle your fancy. Enjoy cooking and eating!
thy temples are like pomegranates
My new favorite fruit, hands down, is the pomegranate.
I cannot believe that before last week I had never peeled and seeded my very own red, rounded, sexy pomegranate. It was great.
I've had everything from pomegranate kefir to pomegranate Greek yogurt with the delicious little seeds to straight up Pom Juice. It's all been taste-bud lovely, but nothing quite as exhilarating as the actual picking and peeling and seeding of my own, whole pomegranate.
The entire experience of cutting and gutting is rewarding. The one I worked on was pretty and plump and yielded a good 2 cups of magenta-shaded, tart-juice-filled beads. My friend, Caitlin, had given me a wonderful little tip for cutting poms - do it in a sink of water (or as I did, bowl of water). That way, you contain the staining mess and your kitchen doesn't end up looking like a crime scene.
Once I had pulled each and every juicy bead from the white inside, I was poppin' them into my mouth, poppin' them onto salads, poppin' them into smoothies. They. Are. So. Fricking. Goooood.
Tart, but refreshing. And oh so pretty to look at.
Mmmmm.
Tonight I am going to be posting a slew of recipes I've accumulated over the past month and a half, so stay tuned. Lots of yummy food that will get your taste-buds doing jigs all up an down the street. No, seriously.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
jumping back in, head first
I'm in that weird cyclical stage of blogging - the longer I wait to resume blogging, the more I have to blog about and thus the more I fear sitting down and blogging because I will NOT be able to recall everything I'm supposed to recall.... ugh.
Yet. Here I am. What, like a month and a half since my last entry? Not terrible, but there is so, so much to put down. I better get crackin'.
I left you, my dear readers, with the happy vs sad thoughts I had about uprooting myself and my family from West Bend and replanting in Pewaukee - a mere 35 minutes south; a life-changing decision nonetheless.
The short of it: it's been good. I know, I know: the simplistic, ruthless teaser. I'll be expounding later. I just wanted to check in and let ya'll know that I'm alive and I'm kicking.
A few things to expect in the next post:
Yet. Here I am. What, like a month and a half since my last entry? Not terrible, but there is so, so much to put down. I better get crackin'.
I left you, my dear readers, with the happy vs sad thoughts I had about uprooting myself and my family from West Bend and replanting in Pewaukee - a mere 35 minutes south; a life-changing decision nonetheless.
The short of it: it's been good. I know, I know: the simplistic, ruthless teaser. I'll be expounding later. I just wanted to check in and let ya'll know that I'm alive and I'm kicking.
A few things to expect in the next post:
- My new favorite fruit/ yummy recipes
- What the boys and I have been up to/ special moments
- Doula workshop and breastfeeding classes
- Simple changes in my life to accompany the change in living location
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
thoughts on moving - sads and happys
In three more glorious moons, we will be uprooting ourselves from West Bend and replanting in "Lake Country" (or, more commonly referred to as Pewaukee). I have such mixed emotions.
Perhaps it's because this entire month has been rumblin' and tumblin'. Lots of tears over finances, job security for Jonathan, (future) schooling for the boys, Jonah's therapy, my doula workshop, heaps of student loan debt, making the final final decision to relocate really fast...
Everything has been a blur. I have found myself on more than one occasion inexplicably sobbing, my mind a complete whirl of everything troublesome or unsettled in my life. It's sorta nuts.
And I try not to worry... Philippians 4:6 makes it's hourly rounds through my head.
My emotions flow and sway, yet Yahweh bends ever-closer to the earth; the Holy Spirit shines light to Christ.
As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.
Yep. One dusty-feeling lady, right here. Be gentle, please, Lord? Give grace. Give strength.
***
Anyway. I view our move to Pewaukee of some significance. I can't quite put my finger on why this move differs from past moves, but it does. Greatly. I feel overall peace about the transition, but... sorrow, too.
I ascertain there's sorrow because my children are growing up as if nomads. You see, we all continue to live, breathe, move, create, rest, run, eat, heal, play, cry, laugh. We make memories within the walls of our dwelling, and so far my children have changed dwellings thrice.
There is such a longing part of me that wants a house - a relatively steady, solid, physical place that can "hold" memories. Does that make any lick of sense?
I want my children to grow up distinctly remembering the smell of mama's cookies wafting through the air - from specific oven to specific room. I want them to remember the look of sunlight as it poured through a specific window. I want them to have a specific place that is comforting and never-changing and full of love... And I know, I know: those last attributes are more contained in my own motherly embrace than in an assembly of brick and mortar. But still. I want something my children can bring their children to and it's like, this is home.
I was deeply bummed when my grandparents sold their quaint ranch house in Grafton. Not because it was a spectacular house (or because it had a rockin' pool :), but truly: because those walls contained a myriad of memories. Sounds, smells, touches. Everything in there. Perhaps never to be experienced by my senses again.
I want familiarity. I want to not move. Ever. Again.
Though, I know that's not going to happen. We will move again. And I well up with tears at the thought. Dangitall.
I am also leery because of location. Pewaukee is one of those beautiful, old communities with a huge, creepy lake. I kinda get "this-place-is-haunted vibes" every time I am in the town! I know it's silly but... yah. I'm hoping to shake those vibes the more I explore the village.
Upsides (because you always have to have those):
1. Booty-shakin'-sized FARMERS MARKET that is open until November! Biggest one in Waukesha county! And it's right up the hill from us! Boo-yah.
2. Good Harvest Market - giant natural foods store, five minutes from my front door!
3. Beautiful (but, yes, still creeptastic) lake and beach.
4. Lovely, well-stocked library (with a freakin' observatory built into it!! No way? WAY!)
5. Just a short drive to Michelle (one of very best friends and one of my first doula clients *shhh!*)
6. A Costco. Two minute walk from our apartment. Say. No. More.
7. Lotsa parks and trails - not as nearby as WB's were, but they're there.
8. Our balcony is HUUUUUUU-mongous. Perfect for growing a container garden (and since it won't be *right up* in the forest, hopefully giant bugs won't eat all my fare... like they did this year.... grrrrr....).
9. There are SO many closets in our apartment. So many. Not that we have a ton of stuff, but it's nice to have options ;)
10. Jonathan can *walk* to work. How awesome is that, my friends? I will have a bit more freedom with having a car (to see my sisters, to go to library reading times, etc).
Sweet, yes?
So, on paper the pros out-weight the cons. I am again feeling optimistic and bubbly after this post.
Pewaukee, be nice to me!
Perhaps it's because this entire month has been rumblin' and tumblin'. Lots of tears over finances, job security for Jonathan, (future) schooling for the boys, Jonah's therapy, my doula workshop, heaps of student loan debt, making the final final decision to relocate really fast...
Everything has been a blur. I have found myself on more than one occasion inexplicably sobbing, my mind a complete whirl of everything troublesome or unsettled in my life. It's sorta nuts.
And I try not to worry... Philippians 4:6 makes it's hourly rounds through my head.
My emotions flow and sway, yet Yahweh bends ever-closer to the earth; the Holy Spirit shines light to Christ.
As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.
Yep. One dusty-feeling lady, right here. Be gentle, please, Lord? Give grace. Give strength.
***
Anyway. I view our move to Pewaukee of some significance. I can't quite put my finger on why this move differs from past moves, but it does. Greatly. I feel overall peace about the transition, but... sorrow, too.
I ascertain there's sorrow because my children are growing up as if nomads. You see, we all continue to live, breathe, move, create, rest, run, eat, heal, play, cry, laugh. We make memories within the walls of our dwelling, and so far my children have changed dwellings thrice.
There is such a longing part of me that wants a house - a relatively steady, solid, physical place that can "hold" memories. Does that make any lick of sense?
I want my children to grow up distinctly remembering the smell of mama's cookies wafting through the air - from specific oven to specific room. I want them to remember the look of sunlight as it poured through a specific window. I want them to have a specific place that is comforting and never-changing and full of love... And I know, I know: those last attributes are more contained in my own motherly embrace than in an assembly of brick and mortar. But still. I want something my children can bring their children to and it's like, this is home.
I was deeply bummed when my grandparents sold their quaint ranch house in Grafton. Not because it was a spectacular house (or because it had a rockin' pool :), but truly: because those walls contained a myriad of memories. Sounds, smells, touches. Everything in there. Perhaps never to be experienced by my senses again.
I want familiarity. I want to not move. Ever. Again.
Though, I know that's not going to happen. We will move again. And I well up with tears at the thought. Dangitall.
I am also leery because of location. Pewaukee is one of those beautiful, old communities with a huge, creepy lake. I kinda get "this-place-is-haunted vibes" every time I am in the town! I know it's silly but... yah. I'm hoping to shake those vibes the more I explore the village.
Upsides (because you always have to have those):
1. Booty-shakin'-sized FARMERS MARKET that is open until November! Biggest one in Waukesha county! And it's right up the hill from us! Boo-yah.
2. Good Harvest Market - giant natural foods store, five minutes from my front door!
3. Beautiful (but, yes, still creeptastic) lake and beach.
4. Lovely, well-stocked library (with a freakin' observatory built into it!! No way? WAY!)
5. Just a short drive to Michelle (one of very best friends and one of my first doula clients *shhh!*)
6. A Costco. Two minute walk from our apartment. Say. No. More.
7. Lotsa parks and trails - not as nearby as WB's were, but they're there.
8. Our balcony is HUUUUUUU-mongous. Perfect for growing a container garden (and since it won't be *right up* in the forest, hopefully giant bugs won't eat all my fare... like they did this year.... grrrrr....).
9. There are SO many closets in our apartment. So many. Not that we have a ton of stuff, but it's nice to have options ;)
10. Jonathan can *walk* to work. How awesome is that, my friends? I will have a bit more freedom with having a car (to see my sisters, to go to library reading times, etc).
Sweet, yes?
So, on paper the pros out-weight the cons. I am again feeling optimistic and bubbly after this post.
Pewaukee, be nice to me!
Monday, August 22, 2011
two beans
Showing off his little muscles after a full, full day of swimming at Regner Park.
Playing with paints (closed tightly in jars, that is). Check out his left hand. That is what happens when big brother accidentally vacuums over baby's hand. Ouchie ouchie.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
somber notes
Riotous youths in London.
30,000 Somali children under 5, dead.
.... and I have complained all week about not being able to find an apartment in Pewaukee with a washer and dryer in the unit.... Lord, have mercy.
***
Where is there beauty?
I look outside tonight, watching the beautiful blue sky grow dark and the pinpoints of starlight gleam, and think: someone is starving right now; someone is hurting right now; someone needs Jesus right NOW.
Jesus. It hits me every so often. Jesus. How dark and lost and void can this world tumble?
Jesus, we could sure use some light down here....
30,000 Somali children under 5, dead.
.... and I have complained all week about not being able to find an apartment in Pewaukee with a washer and dryer in the unit.... Lord, have mercy.
***
Where is there beauty?
I look outside tonight, watching the beautiful blue sky grow dark and the pinpoints of starlight gleam, and think: someone is starving right now; someone is hurting right now; someone needs Jesus right NOW.
Jesus. It hits me every so often. Jesus. How dark and lost and void can this world tumble?
Jesus, we could sure use some light down here....
Monday, August 8, 2011
must sees/ reads
Through Facebook, I get updates on More Business of Being Born, the newest brain child of Rikki Lake and Abby Epstein. To read more about the projects, click here.
The page recently shared a link for this children's book called Mama, Talk About When Max Was Born. It's all about water birth. I'm thinkin' that's pretty sweet!
Also, the artist is from Wisconsin. Yah, Wisconi! Promote that water birth!!
The page recently shared a link for this children's book called Mama, Talk About When Max Was Born. It's all about water birth. I'm thinkin' that's pretty sweet!
Also, the artist is from Wisconsin. Yah, Wisconi! Promote that water birth!!
Sunday, August 7, 2011
i'm tayrd
This. Week. Has. Been. NUTS!
Short version, because I am zonked beyond zonked and have to get up early for Jonah's therapy sessions:
WE ARE MOVING TO PEWAUKEE!
Yes. I can most assuredly say, finally with 100% (for real this time) confidence, that we are packing up and high-tailing it for the beautiful Lake County. I will miss (understatement) West Bend and many, many things about it. But it is time for a change.
I will write more on this later. But as I said: zonked.
***
ALSO! A quick farewell to WBW 2011! It's been great reading other women's accounts of breastfeeding, checking out some rockin' bfing art, and basically advocating the socks off bfing in public.
I mean, these are things I generally do *anyway* but.... it's more fun when there's an actual WEEK to "blame" it on :)
Short version, because I am zonked beyond zonked and have to get up early for Jonah's therapy sessions:
WE ARE MOVING TO PEWAUKEE!
Yes. I can most assuredly say, finally with 100% (for real this time) confidence, that we are packing up and high-tailing it for the beautiful Lake County. I will miss (understatement) West Bend and many, many things about it. But it is time for a change.
I will write more on this later. But as I said: zonked.
***
ALSO! A quick farewell to WBW 2011! It's been great reading other women's accounts of breastfeeding, checking out some rockin' bfing art, and basically advocating the socks off bfing in public.
I mean, these are things I generally do *anyway* but.... it's more fun when there's an actual WEEK to "blame" it on :)
Friday, August 5, 2011
breastfeeding on friday
Jonah has been cutting his upper left cuspid for an eternity now. Come on out, little cuspid!
J is nursing like a fiend, which I suppose is totally relevant, seeing as it's World Breastfeeding Week. I think I am on nursing session.... 54....
:) I love it
J is nursing like a fiend, which I suppose is totally relevant, seeing as it's World Breastfeeding Week. I think I am on nursing session.... 54....
:) I love it
Thursday, August 4, 2011
some of my favorite breastfeeding art
This one is gorgeous. Period.
Nursing. Jesus. Mosaic. I'm there.
Gotta throw some photography in here. I love the soft curves of the baby and the breast juxtaposed against the more solid lines of his mama's arm.
Must include Klimt. ALWAYS include Klimt. I like the flowers in her hair, and how cozy the little one looks.
I received a card with this picture on it right after I found out I was pregnant with Elijah. I always knew I would breastfeed my children, so to get something with such simply beauty was a sweet boost.*These pictures were taken off the "Hey Facebook! Breastfeeding Artwork is not obscene!" page*
**Also, check out the "Historic Photos and Prints of Breastfeeding" page, and become a fan!**
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
world breastfeeding week!
You know what's incredibly touching for a mama who's breastfeeding in public? When a person walks up to her, says how *awesome* it is that she's breastfeeding in public, and hands her this small piece of paper:
This is exactly what happened to me a couple Saturdays ago! Jonathan, the boys, and I were in Bayshore Mall after our biweekly trip to Trader Joe's. Elijah was havin' a hoot in the play area with his peers. Jonah, who was worn out from another rigorous TJ trip, was CUH-rabby, so naturally I brought him in close and he nursed.
I've done this countless times before during my collective 37 months of breastfeeding, but this was the first time an absolute stranger came up and encouraged the crap out of me with such a kind gesture. She sat down near me and we swapped stories - mainly breastfeeding triumphs and trials. What a blessing it was to sit there and shoot the breeze with this woman, feeling totally empowered and not ogled. What a blessing.
Anyway, I want to print of a dozen of these little cards and stash them away in my purse.
This is exactly what happened to me a couple Saturdays ago! Jonathan, the boys, and I were in Bayshore Mall after our biweekly trip to Trader Joe's. Elijah was havin' a hoot in the play area with his peers. Jonah, who was worn out from another rigorous TJ trip, was CUH-rabby, so naturally I brought him in close and he nursed.
I've done this countless times before during my collective 37 months of breastfeeding, but this was the first time an absolute stranger came up and encouraged the crap out of me with such a kind gesture. She sat down near me and we swapped stories - mainly breastfeeding triumphs and trials. What a blessing it was to sit there and shoot the breeze with this woman, feeling totally empowered and not ogled. What a blessing.
Anyway, I want to print of a dozen of these little cards and stash them away in my purse.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
elijah's rhymes
While washing dishes in the kitchen, Elijah and Jonah played with Legos in the front play area. This is what I heard coming from my darling red-head...
"Fight for your rights, fight for your mights, fight for your pights (?) fight for your bites......!"
Then a little later:
"Shoosh, poosh, doosh// shoosh, poosh, doosh" (which, of course, doosh reminded me of douche, and the immature child in me snickered).
And THEN:
"Bit, kit, tick (slant rhyming, see), lick, shhhhhhhhhhhhit!"
I think my eyes became as wide as the plates I was washing. Not wanting to draw attention to the word since he's never said it before and was obviously not knowledgeable or malicious in his use, I just said, "Hmm, let's quiet down now a bit, shall we?"
"Shall we? Shall weeeee?" He giggled. "Sho, mama." And he dragged his ratted copy of Where the Sidewalk Ends over to me.
The kid loves poetry.
"Fight for your rights, fight for your mights, fight for your pights (?) fight for your bites......!"
Then a little later:
"Shoosh, poosh, doosh// shoosh, poosh, doosh" (which, of course, doosh reminded me of douche, and the immature child in me snickered).
And THEN:
"Bit, kit, tick (slant rhyming, see), lick, shhhhhhhhhhhhit!"
I think my eyes became as wide as the plates I was washing. Not wanting to draw attention to the word since he's never said it before and was obviously not knowledgeable or malicious in his use, I just said, "Hmm, let's quiet down now a bit, shall we?"
"Shall we? Shall weeeee?" He giggled. "Sho, mama." And he dragged his ratted copy of Where the Sidewalk Ends over to me.
The kid loves poetry.
Monday, July 25, 2011
poor with words
Have any other mothers out there ever totally blanked on words? Of course you have.
For instance.
Elijah was spelling out words in a vocabulary book (garage sale!!!! 10 cents!!!!!!!) when he came across the word "car". Now, he knows his letters - has since he was super young. But when he came to this particular word, instead of spelling out each letter, he looked at the picture and said, "C-c-c-car, starts with K."
I said, "Look again! What letter is at the beginning there? That's a C."
He was insistent. "No! C-c-c-CAR starts with K!"
To which I replied, "Dude, c can make a hard c-c-c sound. Like...... c-c-car......... c-c-carbohydrate.............. c-c-crap...." I COULD NOT for the life of me think of any other words that began with a hard c! Car, carbs, crap.
Way to go, Em. A+.
Oh, yah...... I really do want to homeschool.
:)
For instance.
Elijah was spelling out words in a vocabulary book (garage sale!!!! 10 cents!!!!!!!) when he came across the word "car". Now, he knows his letters - has since he was super young. But when he came to this particular word, instead of spelling out each letter, he looked at the picture and said, "C-c-c-car, starts with K."
I said, "Look again! What letter is at the beginning there? That's a C."
He was insistent. "No! C-c-c-CAR starts with K!"
To which I replied, "Dude, c can make a hard c-c-c sound. Like...... c-c-car......... c-c-carbohydrate.............. c-c-crap...." I COULD NOT for the life of me think of any other words that began with a hard c! Car, carbs, crap.
Way to go, Em. A+.
Oh, yah...... I really do want to homeschool.
:)
stuff on monday
Montessori Print Shop is having a kick-butt giveaway!
(I think I may be getting myself addicted to these giveaways.... *sigh* I promise not to completely riddle my blog with promos. Promise.... after I win these nomenclature cards. Ha. Haha.)
***
In other news:
BUSY weekend! Cleaned Mija's house, went to Olivia's very first birthday party, beached it up, participated in a very edgy skit in church (I'll write more about the later), helped build the church float for the upcoming Random Lake Fireman's Parade (well, fine... I actually helped stuff goodie-bags, but whatevah), and visited with my sisters and nieces and nephew.
Prayers: please be praying for my mama and dad. I won't go into detail about the situation(s), but they have had one rough year with just... lots of crap thrown their way! They need good ol' bucket-loads of prayer, support, extra hugs if one can spare them... being a pastor and pastor's wife are two difficult paths. Pray for grace.
Today: makin' homemade finger paint! And trying to get outside... with it being so hot, we've only been out a couple times. I completely wither in the heat and humidity.
(I think I may be getting myself addicted to these giveaways.... *sigh* I promise not to completely riddle my blog with promos. Promise.... after I win these nomenclature cards. Ha. Haha.)
***
In other news:
BUSY weekend! Cleaned Mija's house, went to Olivia's very first birthday party, beached it up, participated in a very edgy skit in church (I'll write more about the later), helped build the church float for the upcoming Random Lake Fireman's Parade (well, fine... I actually helped stuff goodie-bags, but whatevah), and visited with my sisters and nieces and nephew.
Prayers: please be praying for my mama and dad. I won't go into detail about the situation(s), but they have had one rough year with just... lots of crap thrown their way! They need good ol' bucket-loads of prayer, support, extra hugs if one can spare them... being a pastor and pastor's wife are two difficult paths. Pray for grace.
Today: makin' homemade finger paint! And trying to get outside... with it being so hot, we've only been out a couple times. I completely wither in the heat and humidity.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
poo part two
Not to continue the pity party, but our request for loan consolidation was denied. Which blows chunks, basically. It's like they took one look at our income, one look at our debt amount, and went "Say WHAAAAT!? *Laughter*snicker*snort* Ummm, NO."
So. Plotting and praying continues......
Thank you to all the sweet people who have extended words of encouragement and prayer. I am deeply moved by all the lovin'. It's hard not to get wrapped up in your own drama, you know, thinking that it's only your family being affected by debt woes. I know we're not the only ones in this situation. For that, I offer prayers for you all.
Silver linings to the day: finding out a friend is pregnant with her fourth baby, playing vacuum-tag with the boys, making scotcheroos, cuddling with Jonathan watching a funny movie (I needed to laugh that hard!).
Good night. HIS mercies are new every morning...
So. Plotting and praying continues......
Thank you to all the sweet people who have extended words of encouragement and prayer. I am deeply moved by all the lovin'. It's hard not to get wrapped up in your own drama, you know, thinking that it's only your family being affected by debt woes. I know we're not the only ones in this situation. For that, I offer prayers for you all.
Silver linings to the day: finding out a friend is pregnant with her fourth baby, playing vacuum-tag with the boys, making scotcheroos, cuddling with Jonathan watching a funny movie (I needed to laugh that hard!).
Good night. HIS mercies are new every morning...
hello, poo hitting fan
Putting out an APB for prayer. And 80,000 bones if you can spare it. Kidding. Sort of.
Oh boy, I am trying to remain focused on a loving God who extends grace after grace after grace. I am trying to remind myself that this is "just a season". I am trying to remind myself that this crappy college debt will go away, some way or another.
I know, beyond shadows of doubt, that Jehovah Jireh, my Provider, will do just that: provide.
BUT. How? How?
Jonathan's working his butt off. I still haven't heard from Panera; if I don't land that job (which I may not, because they are looking for day time workers) I will apply to a couple other places, and then Jonathan's going to try part time at a nearby grocers. I am going to gather up my best portfolio of pictures and frame them (on the cheap) and see if some local coffee shops would allow me to sell them in their establishments. I have everything I need to become a certified doula in my hands... just waiting for the workshop in October, which seems forever away. And then even after that, there's more stuff that needs to be accomplished, you know? This doula business takes time. It will be a good while yet before I begin making income off that...
And after all these efforts, with part time jobs and odd end stuff, we'll still be scrapin' our knees getting by.
It's a sickening feeling to take an unofficial poll and discover that most other people around you - with or without children, with or without college debt - are all spending almost 3x the amount you are on groceries per week. I don't know why this bothers me... especially when I consider that across the world, things look much, much bleaker for a great number of people. I think it goes directly back to a specific moment I had when I was pregnant with Elijah. Jonathan and I were in deferment mode of our loans at that time, but I knew there would come a day when we would owe an insane amount of lettuce to the banks. I remember being 36 weeks pregnant, and breaking into tears in front of a meat case. I know, I know: complete cliche pregnant lady moment. But I thought, I never want my children to go hungry.
And, hello, it's not like they've ever come close, but... truth be told, we're really squeaking, scraping, slipping by... I hate this feeling.
I don't blow this all out here to garner sympathies - just prayer and understanding. And, of course, to feel the peace that typically comes after a good, solid vent into the faceless blogosphere ;)
Maybe we shouldn't have gone to an ultra expensive university. But had we not gone to that particular one, we would not have met each other, we would not have... etc etc. I'll leave it at that. We were both driven there - so, period. It's been done. There's not a lick we can do to change the fact that we went to an ultra expensive university, except bemoan the ridiculous loans we have incurred and wish we had been told "major in something practical and lucrative" instead of "follow your heart" (poetry and film are too hard to crack into, I guess).
I've been teary today. I want to stay home with my children, but still be able to help with the debt load. I want my husband to come home and be able to relax and not be in near-tears himself with stress. I want to be able to go to the grocery store and buy something small without having to check the bank account first.
This all makes me long for heaven, which I guess is the point of our lives anyway: to long for heaven, to strive for God's glory alone. But in the meantime... this. is. difficult.
Oh boy, I am trying to remain focused on a loving God who extends grace after grace after grace. I am trying to remind myself that this is "just a season". I am trying to remind myself that this crappy college debt will go away, some way or another.
I know, beyond shadows of doubt, that Jehovah Jireh, my Provider, will do just that: provide.
BUT. How? How?
Jonathan's working his butt off. I still haven't heard from Panera; if I don't land that job (which I may not, because they are looking for day time workers) I will apply to a couple other places, and then Jonathan's going to try part time at a nearby grocers. I am going to gather up my best portfolio of pictures and frame them (on the cheap) and see if some local coffee shops would allow me to sell them in their establishments. I have everything I need to become a certified doula in my hands... just waiting for the workshop in October, which seems forever away. And then even after that, there's more stuff that needs to be accomplished, you know? This doula business takes time. It will be a good while yet before I begin making income off that...
And after all these efforts, with part time jobs and odd end stuff, we'll still be scrapin' our knees getting by.
It's a sickening feeling to take an unofficial poll and discover that most other people around you - with or without children, with or without college debt - are all spending almost 3x the amount you are on groceries per week. I don't know why this bothers me... especially when I consider that across the world, things look much, much bleaker for a great number of people. I think it goes directly back to a specific moment I had when I was pregnant with Elijah. Jonathan and I were in deferment mode of our loans at that time, but I knew there would come a day when we would owe an insane amount of lettuce to the banks. I remember being 36 weeks pregnant, and breaking into tears in front of a meat case. I know, I know: complete cliche pregnant lady moment. But I thought, I never want my children to go hungry.
And, hello, it's not like they've ever come close, but... truth be told, we're really squeaking, scraping, slipping by... I hate this feeling.
I don't blow this all out here to garner sympathies - just prayer and understanding. And, of course, to feel the peace that typically comes after a good, solid vent into the faceless blogosphere ;)
Maybe we shouldn't have gone to an ultra expensive university. But had we not gone to that particular one, we would not have met each other, we would not have... etc etc. I'll leave it at that. We were both driven there - so, period. It's been done. There's not a lick we can do to change the fact that we went to an ultra expensive university, except bemoan the ridiculous loans we have incurred and wish we had been told "major in something practical and lucrative" instead of "follow your heart" (poetry and film are too hard to crack into, I guess).
I've been teary today. I want to stay home with my children, but still be able to help with the debt load. I want my husband to come home and be able to relax and not be in near-tears himself with stress. I want to be able to go to the grocery store and buy something small without having to check the bank account first.
This all makes me long for heaven, which I guess is the point of our lives anyway: to long for heaven, to strive for God's glory alone. But in the meantime... this. is. difficult.
Monday, July 18, 2011
shameless plug? maybe. a little :)
I have been following the site Living Montessori Now for some time, boundlessly reaping ideas for homeschooling like a crazy, hands-on parent ought. The webmaster's name is Deb, and I have found her site to be an extremely creative and helpful well of information on implementing Montessori principles while living with and teaching children.
Recently, she has hosted a giveaway of grandiose proportions, and I decided (despite my gross luck in situations like these!) to attempt winning the thing! Check it out: twelve albums of activities and curriculum, along with access to insightful icons like Karen Tyler. This. Would. Be. Awesome. Eeeek!
So wish me luck! If you don't enter the contest, at least check out Living Montessori Now to see what neat bits are there! Enjoy.
Recently, she has hosted a giveaway of grandiose proportions, and I decided (despite my gross luck in situations like these!) to attempt winning the thing! Check it out: twelve albums of activities and curriculum, along with access to insightful icons like Karen Tyler. This. Would. Be. Awesome. Eeeek!
So wish me luck! If you don't enter the contest, at least check out Living Montessori Now to see what neat bits are there! Enjoy.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
11:29
Sleeping over at my parent's house tonight! It's storming here in Belgium; loud light streaking the night sky.
Boys are feeling better. Jonathan's feeling yucky. Cold, go away please.
***
Three things.
What is the closest thing to me right now? Besides my laptop? A pile of mail and a glass of water.
Pick up the nearest book, turn to page 35, and go to the 4th full sentence. "To him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generation, forever and ever."
What is your favorite thing about right now? The reality of a warm bed in 3, 2, 1...
Boys are feeling better. Jonathan's feeling yucky. Cold, go away please.
***
Three things.
What is the closest thing to me right now? Besides my laptop? A pile of mail and a glass of water.
Pick up the nearest book, turn to page 35, and go to the 4th full sentence. "To him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generation, forever and ever."
What is your favorite thing about right now? The reality of a warm bed in 3, 2, 1...
Friday, July 15, 2011
breaking silence
I don't know what's up, but the motivation on my internal blog-o-meter is pretty near nil.
Just a few quick facts:
*In the past week I have made our own homemade granola, my second huge batch of laundry soap, homemade yogurt (in a crockpot!), and homemade vanilla pudding. Check! to adding new things on the self-sustaining list. Well.... if we had our own cow for its beautiful, raw milk, then we could REALLY be self-sustaining, right?!
*I am applying to the Panera here in West Bend, for a little part time ditty. I would work in the evenings so Jonathan could be home with the boys. Hopefully, this will only be in place until I am doula-certified in October. But until then, I will be optimistic! I am looking forward to sticky cinnamon crunch bagels and brightly colored polo shirts...
*The boys are sick AGAIN! I'm assuming this time is because we just came back from MI where we ate sub-par eats, and slept sub-par sleeps, and were kinda spotty with our oil application. Eh, such is the life of young people. As of now, Elijah is passed out in bed, little chest heaving (sad, sad!), little forehead red and warm; Jonah is near-naked, curled up next to me, his chest raising nicely, but his nose stuffed gooey and full. Poor lovelies. Their temperaments have been mild, and we've just been reading books, playing low-key games, and watching Wall-E. And lots of cuddling on the couch.
*Because of aforementioned illnesses, I made a huge pot of bubbling chicken soup yesterday. I ladled up three big bowls (one for me and Jonah to split, one for Jonathan, one for Elijah), and began to carry them over to the table. In the middle of this journey, I tipped one bowl toward myself and consequently splattered scalding hot soup all over my hand and forearm. Boy, did I yelp! After running ice cold water on it for 5 minutes, I applied lavender oil, all over. And can you believe - not only did it take away the searing pain immediately, I have not ONE blister the next day. Lavender oil - I cannot say enough good about it! It's my favorite. I think I may propose.
*And in conclusion: did you know that when a mama kisses her baby, she picks up pathogens that are present on the baby's face that the baby is about to ingest? The mother's secondary lymphoid organs then take up the pathogens and re-stimulate memory B cells specific for them, which then migrate to the mother's breast milk where they produce essential antibodies for the nursling.
Isn't God awesome? The whole orchestration of that is just... wow.
G'night.
Just a few quick facts:
*In the past week I have made our own homemade granola, my second huge batch of laundry soap, homemade yogurt (in a crockpot!), and homemade vanilla pudding. Check! to adding new things on the self-sustaining list. Well.... if we had our own cow for its beautiful, raw milk, then we could REALLY be self-sustaining, right?!
*I am applying to the Panera here in West Bend, for a little part time ditty. I would work in the evenings so Jonathan could be home with the boys. Hopefully, this will only be in place until I am doula-certified in October. But until then, I will be optimistic! I am looking forward to sticky cinnamon crunch bagels and brightly colored polo shirts...
*The boys are sick AGAIN! I'm assuming this time is because we just came back from MI where we ate sub-par eats, and slept sub-par sleeps, and were kinda spotty with our oil application. Eh, such is the life of young people. As of now, Elijah is passed out in bed, little chest heaving (sad, sad!), little forehead red and warm; Jonah is near-naked, curled up next to me, his chest raising nicely, but his nose stuffed gooey and full. Poor lovelies. Their temperaments have been mild, and we've just been reading books, playing low-key games, and watching Wall-E. And lots of cuddling on the couch.
*Because of aforementioned illnesses, I made a huge pot of bubbling chicken soup yesterday. I ladled up three big bowls (one for me and Jonah to split, one for Jonathan, one for Elijah), and began to carry them over to the table. In the middle of this journey, I tipped one bowl toward myself and consequently splattered scalding hot soup all over my hand and forearm. Boy, did I yelp! After running ice cold water on it for 5 minutes, I applied lavender oil, all over. And can you believe - not only did it take away the searing pain immediately, I have not ONE blister the next day. Lavender oil - I cannot say enough good about it! It's my favorite. I think I may propose.
*And in conclusion: did you know that when a mama kisses her baby, she picks up pathogens that are present on the baby's face that the baby is about to ingest? The mother's secondary lymphoid organs then take up the pathogens and re-stimulate memory B cells specific for them, which then migrate to the mother's breast milk where they produce essential antibodies for the nursling.
Isn't God awesome? The whole orchestration of that is just... wow.
G'night.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Monday, July 4, 2011
7:32 AM
Jonah and I are playing Duplos on the floor (very sweetly lent to us by Mija and her children).
Today, we are:
*NOT cleaning the apartment. I'll reeeeeally have to fight the urge on this one. Truly. It's a sty. But Jonathan's home, the weather is gorgeous, and I want to connect with my children on a purely crazy-fun level. It's the Fourth, after all!
*Baking homemade chocolate cupcakes with chocolate frosting to celebrate Elijah's pooping in the toilet AND mastering "the BIG porcelain" as we call it 'round here. *Sniff, sniff* my little boy is growing up! Sidenote: we've also forgone disposable diapers altogether, forcing us to have Elijah diaperless at night... which has resulted in "pee pants" at least once every night for the past week (usually twice if he has had something to drink before bed). What else can I do besides nix before bedtime drinking? He has a mattress pad OVER his sheet (to preserve the sheet and my sanity!) so the cleanup is no biggie, but I feel bad for him waking up uncomfortable, smelly, and wet. TIPS!?
*Going to the splash pad in Jackson, which is (cha-CHING) FREE.
*Calling up Caleb to wish him a happy golden fourth birthday!
*Driving to Sheboygan for a partay at the Haffeman's and fireworks on the Lake. Another sidenote: we went to the Grafton fireworks on Saturday night, with Elijah and Jonah. Those boys LOVE fireworks. Absolutely head-over-heels LOVE them. During the finale, Elijah was clapping and screaming and laughing and dancing; Jonah was doing his own "dance moves" and laughing hysterically. They had a blast. And not ONE mosquito bite. Thank you, Purification oil!
ALRIGHTY THEN. Jonah, who is enjoying some "butt-time", just pooed and peed on the floor. That, dear readers, is my cue to go and slap a dipe on him.
Enjoy your holiday!
Today, we are:
*NOT cleaning the apartment. I'll reeeeeally have to fight the urge on this one. Truly. It's a sty. But Jonathan's home, the weather is gorgeous, and I want to connect with my children on a purely crazy-fun level. It's the Fourth, after all!
*Baking homemade chocolate cupcakes with chocolate frosting to celebrate Elijah's pooping in the toilet AND mastering "the BIG porcelain" as we call it 'round here. *Sniff, sniff* my little boy is growing up! Sidenote: we've also forgone disposable diapers altogether, forcing us to have Elijah diaperless at night... which has resulted in "pee pants" at least once every night for the past week (usually twice if he has had something to drink before bed). What else can I do besides nix before bedtime drinking? He has a mattress pad OVER his sheet (to preserve the sheet and my sanity!) so the cleanup is no biggie, but I feel bad for him waking up uncomfortable, smelly, and wet. TIPS!?
*Going to the splash pad in Jackson, which is (cha-CHING) FREE.
*Calling up Caleb to wish him a happy golden fourth birthday!
*Driving to Sheboygan for a partay at the Haffeman's and fireworks on the Lake. Another sidenote: we went to the Grafton fireworks on Saturday night, with Elijah and Jonah. Those boys LOVE fireworks. Absolutely head-over-heels LOVE them. During the finale, Elijah was clapping and screaming and laughing and dancing; Jonah was doing his own "dance moves" and laughing hysterically. They had a blast. And not ONE mosquito bite. Thank you, Purification oil!
ALRIGHTY THEN. Jonah, who is enjoying some "butt-time", just pooed and peed on the floor. That, dear readers, is my cue to go and slap a dipe on him.
Enjoy your holiday!
Sunday, June 26, 2011
elijah, 3 years 5 months
Elijah,
My love.
Lately, you have been... difficult. I hate using that terminology, but...! I sorta had a mini meltdown today after church because you just would not listen. I endlessly reason with you, and 50% of the time this tactic works. But the other half of the time it doesn't, or sometimes I don't want to friggin' reason with you! Sometimes, I simply want you to obey. Why do you have to be so stinkin' strong-willed?! MAN.
Truthfully, I view your strong-will as a blessing, not a hindrance. I intercede for you, asking that this trait will be used in good, good ways as you grow older - that you would defend Truth, love people passionately, help those who are less fortunate, and do whatever else it is that you're called to do with that same attitude of tenacity and chutzpah.
And gauging from the fieriness of it, I highly doubt the chutzpah will ever wear away, but I do hope you learn to harness it! 'Cause, dude, no one likes a tantrum. Especially the poor, weather-worn mama, that's fo dang sho.
I love you, and I know you know that... but, boy.... you threw me for a loopy-loop when you turned from sweet babe to defiant, stubborn, boisterous mover n' shaker. I noticed the transition around your third birthday, actually. And that's not to say you're not ever sweet - you are. You can be so deliciously sweet and kind and helpful. But sometimes the "dark side" seems to dominate. I'm thinking (and holding to the hopes of encouraging people) that the sheer defiance will mellow out by four years of age, and you'll be more trusting of me. That you'll understand more of your surroundings, and of me and my role in your life, and of God and his plans. In the meantime, I am praying and imparting tons of grace to you, and trusting our Heavenly Father to do the same for me. I am not, by any means, a pro at this parenting stuff. I need bucketloads of grace, daily.
On the lighter side of thangs:
1. You played outside with water guns all day long, which totally tuckered you out. You passed out *cold* in the car around 6:30. Fab. You are so gorgeous when you sleep.
2. You adore anything and everything pirate. You have a little wooden medallion with your name on one side and the Jolly Roger on the other. When I asked you who the Jolly Roger was, you promptly replied, "That's Golly Roger!" I laughed quite a bit over that one. I haven't the heart to correct you... ever....
3. You give your brother these kick-butt hugs when the two of you aren't wrestling like absolute INGRATES. You were acting so dramatic about it today especially: you'd close your eyes in this emotional, pained manner, and envelop Jonah in your arms. It looked so theatrical - I must capture it in photo form. Hysterical.
You would also say repeatedly "I love you, Jonah" and plant a kiss on his head or cheek. Mama's heart was a puddle.
4. On Saturday, you walked the longest you've ever walked - about 2 miles! On your own two legs! I was so proud!
Granted, 3/4 of the way through you completely lost your cool, and indulged a huuuuge tantrum. I couldn't carry you, because I had Jonah in the sling, and you wouldn't let Michelle carry you because - OF COURSE - she's not ME. Soooo, you threw yourself on the sidewalk right in front of a house with people out in their yard (naturally). That's when I ripped [the near-sleeping] Jonah out of the sling, handed him to Michelle [cue crying on his end], picked you up by your shirt, and probably looked like a maniac as I scurried away with my nutbag children. I held you, reluctantly at first (because I was mad and hot and embarrassed) and mumbled things through my gritted teeth like: "youNEVERdothatEVERagainorIwillTAKEYOURBLOCKSAWAYFORGOOD!"
After you and I calmed down, and I got over my silly embarrassment, I realized that HEY, you were exhausted. Slack was definitely cut. But still... we try not to flail in front of people's homes, mkay? I think we'll put our next long walk on hold for a bit, or at least let ya ride in the wagon :)
And all that said (er, written) I am still proud you walked most of it. Two miles is nothing for me, but for your little legs, it's a hike. We have to build endurance. Mama should know that *DOH*
4. I don't know who taught you Cold War Kids (Daddy, I presume) but keep it coming! Talk about making me smile!
Wrestling. You're winning, 'Lije.
Walking by the forest in our backyard.
Whippin out some bubbly.
Blowing little bubs.
The wind caught the bubbles a couple times. You thought that was pretty neat.
Fishy lips.
See? Chutzpah.
She LIKES me!
Your lady friend, Aira, from across Grandma and Papa's house. She picked you up in her ride.
Showing off your cute biceps. I cannot stand the adorable factor. GAH.
My love.
Lately, you have been... difficult. I hate using that terminology, but...! I sorta had a mini meltdown today after church because you just would not listen. I endlessly reason with you, and 50% of the time this tactic works. But the other half of the time it doesn't, or sometimes I don't want to friggin' reason with you! Sometimes, I simply want you to obey. Why do you have to be so stinkin' strong-willed?! MAN.
Truthfully, I view your strong-will as a blessing, not a hindrance. I intercede for you, asking that this trait will be used in good, good ways as you grow older - that you would defend Truth, love people passionately, help those who are less fortunate, and do whatever else it is that you're called to do with that same attitude of tenacity and chutzpah.
And gauging from the fieriness of it, I highly doubt the chutzpah will ever wear away, but I do hope you learn to harness it! 'Cause, dude, no one likes a tantrum. Especially the poor, weather-worn mama, that's fo dang sho.
I love you, and I know you know that... but, boy.... you threw me for a loopy-loop when you turned from sweet babe to defiant, stubborn, boisterous mover n' shaker. I noticed the transition around your third birthday, actually. And that's not to say you're not ever sweet - you are. You can be so deliciously sweet and kind and helpful. But sometimes the "dark side" seems to dominate. I'm thinking (and holding to the hopes of encouraging people) that the sheer defiance will mellow out by four years of age, and you'll be more trusting of me. That you'll understand more of your surroundings, and of me and my role in your life, and of God and his plans. In the meantime, I am praying and imparting tons of grace to you, and trusting our Heavenly Father to do the same for me. I am not, by any means, a pro at this parenting stuff. I need bucketloads of grace, daily.
On the lighter side of thangs:
1. You played outside with water guns all day long, which totally tuckered you out. You passed out *cold* in the car around 6:30. Fab. You are so gorgeous when you sleep.
2. You adore anything and everything pirate. You have a little wooden medallion with your name on one side and the Jolly Roger on the other. When I asked you who the Jolly Roger was, you promptly replied, "That's Golly Roger!" I laughed quite a bit over that one. I haven't the heart to correct you... ever....
3. You give your brother these kick-butt hugs when the two of you aren't wrestling like absolute INGRATES. You were acting so dramatic about it today especially: you'd close your eyes in this emotional, pained manner, and envelop Jonah in your arms. It looked so theatrical - I must capture it in photo form. Hysterical.
You would also say repeatedly "I love you, Jonah" and plant a kiss on his head or cheek. Mama's heart was a puddle.
4. On Saturday, you walked the longest you've ever walked - about 2 miles! On your own two legs! I was so proud!
Granted, 3/4 of the way through you completely lost your cool, and indulged a huuuuge tantrum. I couldn't carry you, because I had Jonah in the sling, and you wouldn't let Michelle carry you because - OF COURSE - she's not ME. Soooo, you threw yourself on the sidewalk right in front of a house with people out in their yard (naturally). That's when I ripped [the near-sleeping] Jonah out of the sling, handed him to Michelle [cue crying on his end], picked you up by your shirt, and probably looked like a maniac as I scurried away with my nutbag children. I held you, reluctantly at first (because I was mad and hot and embarrassed) and mumbled things through my gritted teeth like: "youNEVERdothatEVERagainorIwillTAKEYOURBLOCKSAWAYFORGOOD!"
After you and I calmed down, and I got over my silly embarrassment, I realized that HEY, you were exhausted. Slack was definitely cut. But still... we try not to flail in front of people's homes, mkay? I think we'll put our next long walk on hold for a bit, or at least let ya ride in the wagon :)
And all that said (er, written) I am still proud you walked most of it. Two miles is nothing for me, but for your little legs, it's a hike. We have to build endurance. Mama should know that *DOH*
4. I don't know who taught you Cold War Kids (Daddy, I presume) but keep it coming! Talk about making me smile!
Wrestling. You're winning, 'Lije.
Walking by the forest in our backyard.
Whippin out some bubbly.
Blowing little bubs.
The wind caught the bubbles a couple times. You thought that was pretty neat.
Fishy lips.
See? Chutzpah.
She LIKES me!
Your lady friend, Aira, from across Grandma and Papa's house. She picked you up in her ride.
Showing off your cute biceps. I cannot stand the adorable factor. GAH.Friday, June 24, 2011
eatin' me out of house and home...
It is mind-blowingly obvious when Elijah is in the midst of a growth spurt.
He's not a picky eater when it comes to the type of food. He loves most vegetables, all types of fruit, grains, cheeses, etc. He is daring to try new things (with only a smidgen of coercion :).
But, overall, he is very picky about the amount of food. No matter what it is. It could be a huge slice of chocolatey chocolate cake and he'd nibble a few nibbles then be finished. He just doesn't eat a ton.....
That is until he hits a growth spurt. Then he's practically begging to eat the kitchen sink.
EXAMPLE: This morning we had what Pippin the Hobbit referred to as second breakfast. And third breakfast.
I prepared scrambled eggs loaded with spinach and cheese, spelt toast with real butter and no sugar cherry jam, and pear slices. While I focused mostly on Jonah, Elijah downed probably 3 eggs worth of scrambled eggs, 2 slices of toast, and 3/4 of the pear slices (for which he asked a bit of sunbutter).
THEN, not 20 minutes later, he ever-so-politely requested a bowl of cereal. Knowing how much energy this kid exerts in one day, I usually oblige when he asks for more food. So I poured him a bowl of oatmeal squares with almond milk and a big glass of pomegranate kefir.
Gone in 10 seconds.
THEN, not another 20 minutes after THAT, I was getting Jonathan's lunch ready (leftover eggplant lasagna) and Elijah wanted some o' that! I think I just starred at him for 47 seconds before managing an "are you kidding me?" He smiled, asked again. I gave him a 3 in x 3 in piece of that, cold. He ate it up cheerily, then asked, "Could I have a sip of yo lemon watah?" Yes. So he sipped out of my lemon water then - finally - seemed satiated.
What a hoss!
Another indicator of growth spurt is that he actually wants to nap. He's a whirl of go-go-go-go let'splayhideandgoseekandtagandtictactoeandletsjumpoffthebalconyandscreamhelloatourneighborsandblahblahblahblahblah
and then CRASH.
So he's passed out on the floor in my bedroom, mouth open, drool pourin'.
What a silly willy child.
He will, no doubt, wake up, want to eat and eat and eat again, so I'm getting a jump start on lunch. Jonah's in the sling, and I'll be whipping up a hearty homemade chicken soup with kale, white beans, carrots, celery, quinoa (he'll only eat that in soup), onions, and garlic. A side of freshly baked focaccia.
Hopefully that will sustain the growing beast for a couple more hours!
Boy, oh boy. I have boys.
He's not a picky eater when it comes to the type of food. He loves most vegetables, all types of fruit, grains, cheeses, etc. He is daring to try new things (with only a smidgen of coercion :).
But, overall, he is very picky about the amount of food. No matter what it is. It could be a huge slice of chocolatey chocolate cake and he'd nibble a few nibbles then be finished. He just doesn't eat a ton.....
That is until he hits a growth spurt. Then he's practically begging to eat the kitchen sink.
EXAMPLE: This morning we had what Pippin the Hobbit referred to as second breakfast. And third breakfast.
I prepared scrambled eggs loaded with spinach and cheese, spelt toast with real butter and no sugar cherry jam, and pear slices. While I focused mostly on Jonah, Elijah downed probably 3 eggs worth of scrambled eggs, 2 slices of toast, and 3/4 of the pear slices (for which he asked a bit of sunbutter).
THEN, not 20 minutes later, he ever-so-politely requested a bowl of cereal. Knowing how much energy this kid exerts in one day, I usually oblige when he asks for more food. So I poured him a bowl of oatmeal squares with almond milk and a big glass of pomegranate kefir.
Gone in 10 seconds.
THEN, not another 20 minutes after THAT, I was getting Jonathan's lunch ready (leftover eggplant lasagna) and Elijah wanted some o' that! I think I just starred at him for 47 seconds before managing an "are you kidding me?" He smiled, asked again. I gave him a 3 in x 3 in piece of that, cold. He ate it up cheerily, then asked, "Could I have a sip of yo lemon watah?" Yes. So he sipped out of my lemon water then - finally - seemed satiated.
What a hoss!
Another indicator of growth spurt is that he actually wants to nap. He's a whirl of go-go-go-go let'splayhideandgoseekandtagandtictactoeandletsjumpoffthebalconyandscreamhelloatourneighborsandblahblahblahblahblah
and then CRASH.
So he's passed out on the floor in my bedroom, mouth open, drool pourin'.
What a silly willy child.
He will, no doubt, wake up, want to eat and eat and eat again, so I'm getting a jump start on lunch. Jonah's in the sling, and I'll be whipping up a hearty homemade chicken soup with kale, white beans, carrots, celery, quinoa (he'll only eat that in soup), onions, and garlic. A side of freshly baked focaccia.
Hopefully that will sustain the growing beast for a couple more hours!
Boy, oh boy. I have boys.
Monday, June 13, 2011
the short(ish) versions
Oh, oh, oh.
So many, many things to catch up on...
*The doula workshop I plan on attending will be late October in Milwaukee. I've already begun the required reading, which is all so deeply informative, exhausting, and incredible - I only hope my postpartum brain can keep up!
The more I stride toward the goal of "doula" and the more prayer I pour into the venture, the more convinced I become that this path will continue to unfold to beauty and growth. I am thankful to the Lord for every opportunity he has presented thus far. By his grace, he will continue to guide...
*Outside the required reading, I picked up a few extra birth titles, including: Labor of Love: A Midwife's Memoir and Your Best Birth. Labor of Love is killer so far. My favorite quote: I'm going to have more skills and knowledge at my disposal than pinching a woman's nipples in an emergency. Taken out of context, that has the ability to furrow some brows. But rest assured: it's all about birth and postpartum and being aware, intuitive, and prepared as a homebirth midwife.
* Jonathan and I celebrated our past five years! He surprised me with a quick trip to Galena, IL (sans boys) to Cloran Mansion. We stayed in our own private bungalow, complete with a gorgeous candlelit diner (the salad was absolutely rave-able, read: Jonathan raved about the salad!) and my filet mignon was perfection in beef form). We enjoyed quiet time! We left distractions off. We slept in until 10 AM. We indulged in couple's massages (my first massage ever, and I just about DIED from happiness)!! We walked the historic shopping district, grabbed Intelligentsia coffee, sampled wines and cheeses, bought the boys a new book, made candles, sat in an old monastery and talked and cuddled and loved each other. We had a stellar breakfast (that I didn't have to make!) complete with pesto mashed potatoes and french toasts and beef sausages and juicy watermelon. We made sweet conversation with other guests in the B&B, and I discovered another fellow birth junkie. The two of us girls gabbed on and on about birth positions until our husbands' listless faces cued us to stop. It was grrrrreat.
Jonathan and I drove back home after only 24 hours of separation from "real" life, and yet we felt wholly rejuvenated and more connected to each other. The boys missed us, as we missed them! It was sweet to hear their calls and laughs when they saw us home again.
And hoo-boy! I forgot about the probable engorgement that would ensue from not having Jonah nursing... DUH. Jonah slept just fine on almond milk, apparently, but I was soooooooo glad to have him at my breast after 24 hours. I haven't been that full since Elijah was an infant. Ouchie.
*My older sister Erin is pregnant with baby #2! Wahoooooo! Olive will be a big sister (and I may have another daycareling)
*Oh, dudes, I am zonked with a capital Z. I've been quite absent on the blogging scene, for which I sorta apologize, but not really :) We're walking a lot this spring. It's been grand. We've been making friends, beaching, trekking, wading, swinging, picnicking, reading, painting, tantruming (boooooo), cobedding, traveling... the Midwest, praying, eating, dozing, baking.
God is good.
So many, many things to catch up on...
*The doula workshop I plan on attending will be late October in Milwaukee. I've already begun the required reading, which is all so deeply informative, exhausting, and incredible - I only hope my postpartum brain can keep up!
The more I stride toward the goal of "doula" and the more prayer I pour into the venture, the more convinced I become that this path will continue to unfold to beauty and growth. I am thankful to the Lord for every opportunity he has presented thus far. By his grace, he will continue to guide...
*Outside the required reading, I picked up a few extra birth titles, including: Labor of Love: A Midwife's Memoir and Your Best Birth. Labor of Love is killer so far. My favorite quote: I'm going to have more skills and knowledge at my disposal than pinching a woman's nipples in an emergency. Taken out of context, that has the ability to furrow some brows. But rest assured: it's all about birth and postpartum and being aware, intuitive, and prepared as a homebirth midwife.
* Jonathan and I celebrated our past five years! He surprised me with a quick trip to Galena, IL (sans boys) to Cloran Mansion. We stayed in our own private bungalow, complete with a gorgeous candlelit diner (the salad was absolutely rave-able, read: Jonathan raved about the salad!) and my filet mignon was perfection in beef form). We enjoyed quiet time! We left distractions off. We slept in until 10 AM. We indulged in couple's massages (my first massage ever, and I just about DIED from happiness)!! We walked the historic shopping district, grabbed Intelligentsia coffee, sampled wines and cheeses, bought the boys a new book, made candles, sat in an old monastery and talked and cuddled and loved each other. We had a stellar breakfast (that I didn't have to make!) complete with pesto mashed potatoes and french toasts and beef sausages and juicy watermelon. We made sweet conversation with other guests in the B&B, and I discovered another fellow birth junkie. The two of us girls gabbed on and on about birth positions until our husbands' listless faces cued us to stop. It was grrrrreat.
Jonathan and I drove back home after only 24 hours of separation from "real" life, and yet we felt wholly rejuvenated and more connected to each other. The boys missed us, as we missed them! It was sweet to hear their calls and laughs when they saw us home again.
And hoo-boy! I forgot about the probable engorgement that would ensue from not having Jonah nursing... DUH. Jonah slept just fine on almond milk, apparently, but I was soooooooo glad to have him at my breast after 24 hours. I haven't been that full since Elijah was an infant. Ouchie.
*My older sister Erin is pregnant with baby #2! Wahoooooo! Olive will be a big sister (and I may have another daycareling)
*Oh, dudes, I am zonked with a capital Z. I've been quite absent on the blogging scene, for which I sorta apologize, but not really :) We're walking a lot this spring. It's been grand. We've been making friends, beaching, trekking, wading, swinging, picnicking, reading, painting, tantruming (boooooo), cobedding, traveling... the Midwest, praying, eating, dozing, baking.
God is good.
I remember once sitting at the hairdresser's. The woman beside me reads, and I read the title in the reflection of the mirror: 1000 Places to See Before You Die. Is that it? Are there physical places that simply must be seen before I stop breathing within time, before I inhale eternity?
Why? To say that I've had reason to bow low? To say that I've seen beauty? To say that I've been arrested by wonder?
Isn't it here? Can't I find it here?
These very real lungs will breathe in more than 11,000 liters of air today, and tonight over our farm will rise the Great Hexagon of the blazing winter stars - Sirius, Rigel, ruby Aldebran, Capella, the fiery Gemini twins, the Procyon, and in the center, scarlet Betelgeuse, the red supergiant larger than twice the size of the earth's orbit around the sun - and I will embrace the skin of a boy child that my body grew from a seed. The low heavens outside the paned windows fill with more snowflakes than stars, no two-stacked crystals the same; the trees in the wood draw in collective green breath to the still of January hibernation, and God in the world will birth ice from his womb, frost from heaven, bind the chains of the Pleiades, loose the cords of Orion, and number again the strands on my head (Job 38:31; Matthew 10:30).
Isn't it here? The wonder? Why do I spend so much of my living hours struggling to see it? Do we truly stumble so blind that we must be affronted with blinding magnificence for our blurry soul-sight to recognize grandeur? The very same surging magnificence that cascades over our every day here? Who has time or eyes to notice?
-One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp
Why? To say that I've had reason to bow low? To say that I've seen beauty? To say that I've been arrested by wonder?
Isn't it here? Can't I find it here?
These very real lungs will breathe in more than 11,000 liters of air today, and tonight over our farm will rise the Great Hexagon of the blazing winter stars - Sirius, Rigel, ruby Aldebran, Capella, the fiery Gemini twins, the Procyon, and in the center, scarlet Betelgeuse, the red supergiant larger than twice the size of the earth's orbit around the sun - and I will embrace the skin of a boy child that my body grew from a seed. The low heavens outside the paned windows fill with more snowflakes than stars, no two-stacked crystals the same; the trees in the wood draw in collective green breath to the still of January hibernation, and God in the world will birth ice from his womb, frost from heaven, bind the chains of the Pleiades, loose the cords of Orion, and number again the strands on my head (Job 38:31; Matthew 10:30).
Isn't it here? The wonder? Why do I spend so much of my living hours struggling to see it? Do we truly stumble so blind that we must be affronted with blinding magnificence for our blurry soul-sight to recognize grandeur? The very same surging magnificence that cascades over our every day here? Who has time or eyes to notice?
-One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp
Thursday, June 2, 2011
loud vs quiet
All the babes are napping.
Olive, in her bouncy chair, sippy-cup in sleepy hands; Jonah, nestled quietly on my bed, surrounded by pillows; Elijah, on his own bed with his butt in the air, his face serene.
Ten minutes ago I was wanting to pull my hair out on account of clamorous children! Now, I can stand a lot of noise - I grew up in a relatively big home with a lot of noisy peeps. I'm pretty tolerant of noise...
But I'm talking: Olive, who is at that super clumsy stage where she's crawling fast, rolling everywhere, trying to stand and walk and grab things..... she is constantly getting hurt. Like, every two seconds - falling, bumping her head, smacking herself in the face with a block (?), crawling underneath chairs and couches and BOOKCASES and getting stuck........ And it's not like I'm not right there! I see her, I try to guide her and help out. But somehow the little Olive keeps inflicting pain on her little frame. And she's a very sensitive soul. Every minor bump elicits the craziest, loudest cry. Ahhhh, so I have that "siren" going on....
THEN, Jonah and Elijah were wrestling. Wrestling, people. A 17-month and a 39-month old - the older with the younger in a headlock, and the younger with the older by the hair. It was a tangle of loud laughter and groaning, biting and tickling. I broke it up. I know, I know.... stick in the mud. It was in that moment that I came to the profound realization: I have two, freakin' boys who are going to roughhouse for the rest of their lives probably. AH! It's fun... and kinda scary scary scary at the same time.
Anyway, add Ella Jenkins' "Jambo" blasting in the background, the lawnmower revving outside, and the fact that I went to sleep too late last night (so I was already very frazzled and worn) and VOILA - mother *loudly* announces nap time for all!
Thankfully, they all went down with nary a peep, which is almost always the case.
So now, here I sit.... enjoying my quiet..... sipping my tea, munchin on some kale chips. Typing.
Ooo, and I signed up for a doula workshop in October! I promise to write more on that all later.
For now, peace out.
Olive, in her bouncy chair, sippy-cup in sleepy hands; Jonah, nestled quietly on my bed, surrounded by pillows; Elijah, on his own bed with his butt in the air, his face serene.
Ten minutes ago I was wanting to pull my hair out on account of clamorous children! Now, I can stand a lot of noise - I grew up in a relatively big home with a lot of noisy peeps. I'm pretty tolerant of noise...
But I'm talking: Olive, who is at that super clumsy stage where she's crawling fast, rolling everywhere, trying to stand and walk and grab things..... she is constantly getting hurt. Like, every two seconds - falling, bumping her head, smacking herself in the face with a block (?), crawling underneath chairs and couches and BOOKCASES and getting stuck........ And it's not like I'm not right there! I see her, I try to guide her and help out. But somehow the little Olive keeps inflicting pain on her little frame. And she's a very sensitive soul. Every minor bump elicits the craziest, loudest cry. Ahhhh, so I have that "siren" going on....
THEN, Jonah and Elijah were wrestling. Wrestling, people. A 17-month and a 39-month old - the older with the younger in a headlock, and the younger with the older by the hair. It was a tangle of loud laughter and groaning, biting and tickling. I broke it up. I know, I know.... stick in the mud. It was in that moment that I came to the profound realization: I have two, freakin' boys who are going to roughhouse for the rest of their lives probably. AH! It's fun... and kinda scary scary scary at the same time.
Anyway, add Ella Jenkins' "Jambo" blasting in the background, the lawnmower revving outside, and the fact that I went to sleep too late last night (so I was already very frazzled and worn) and VOILA - mother *loudly* announces nap time for all!
Thankfully, they all went down with nary a peep, which is almost always the case.
So now, here I sit.... enjoying my quiet..... sipping my tea, munchin on some kale chips. Typing.
Ooo, and I signed up for a doula workshop in October! I promise to write more on that all later.
For now, peace out.
a little on patience and discpline
"The problem with patience and discipline is that it requires both of them to develop each of them."
(from the book The Practicing Mind)
I saw this on my friend Ryan's Facebook page and thought "Well, gee. If that's not the unfortunate reality of parenting!"
We parents, while trying to cultivate patience and self-discipline in our children, are at times having to strive just as hard (if not harder!) to cultivate those attributes in ourselves. And to top that off, one takes the honing of the other, and vice versa. It can be infuriating!
Oh, God, thank you for your ceaseless grace.....
(from the book The Practicing Mind)
I saw this on my friend Ryan's Facebook page and thought "Well, gee. If that's not the unfortunate reality of parenting!"
We parents, while trying to cultivate patience and self-discipline in our children, are at times having to strive just as hard (if not harder!) to cultivate those attributes in ourselves. And to top that off, one takes the honing of the other, and vice versa. It can be infuriating!
Oh, God, thank you for your ceaseless grace.....
Monday, May 23, 2011
supermom monday
Oh, if only every day could be a supermom day....?
Alas.
I....
... woke up at 5. FIVE AM. AM meaning MORNING. That's right.
... made breakfast; a whole mess o' sweet potatoes (for Jonah and Olive); and two dinners (one for tonight, the other for tomorrow, I guess).
... cleaned the house (well, most of it) while the babies played (only two spats during that time!)
... started my planner for next year, when I plan to begin "schooling" Elijah.
... hung new photos on the wall.
... played tag.
... played hide-and-go-seek.
... played duck-duck-goose (which falls kinda flat on a bunch of wee ones who cannot run).
... defeated the dragon and saved princess Olive from (as Elijah put it) The Masked Retriever. ?.
... finally finished FIVE loads of clean laundry that had just been hanging out for, um, 3 days in baskets. Doh.
... put all the three kiddos down for naps (simultaneously) so I could go to my downstairs neighbor's porch and clean spilled almond milk off her lawn chairs and table (courtesy of Elijah).
... taped two books that had been ripped (courtesy of Olive).
... read devotions and journaled (a rarity in the morn).
... showered.
... cleaned one pee accident, one poop accident, and one barfy accident (all while maintaining composure, which is a huge step for me! :)
... baked Elijah's "poopy" (chocolate) cake. I never used treats when toilet-training, though I did say that once E began pooing in the toilet regularly, we would celebrate big time with a "poopy" cake (as he fondly calls it). So that yummy guy is baked, cooling, and ready for frosting.
... now, I am fiddle-faddling online. Muhaha.
... well, now I hear Olive cooing in her chair..... should probably get her, hmm?
Stay tuned for: Emili will be a doula sooner rather than later. It's been "re-front-burner-ized."
Alas.
I....
... woke up at 5. FIVE AM. AM meaning MORNING. That's right.
... made breakfast; a whole mess o' sweet potatoes (for Jonah and Olive); and two dinners (one for tonight, the other for tomorrow, I guess).
... cleaned the house (well, most of it) while the babies played (only two spats during that time!)
... started my planner for next year, when I plan to begin "schooling" Elijah.
... hung new photos on the wall.
... played tag.
... played hide-and-go-seek.
... played duck-duck-goose (which falls kinda flat on a bunch of wee ones who cannot run).
... defeated the dragon and saved princess Olive from (as Elijah put it) The Masked Retriever. ?.
... finally finished FIVE loads of clean laundry that had just been hanging out for, um, 3 days in baskets. Doh.
... put all the three kiddos down for naps (simultaneously) so I could go to my downstairs neighbor's porch and clean spilled almond milk off her lawn chairs and table (courtesy of Elijah).
... taped two books that had been ripped (courtesy of Olive).
... read devotions and journaled (a rarity in the morn).
... showered.
... cleaned one pee accident, one poop accident, and one barfy accident (all while maintaining composure, which is a huge step for me! :)
... baked Elijah's "poopy" (chocolate) cake. I never used treats when toilet-training, though I did say that once E began pooing in the toilet regularly, we would celebrate big time with a "poopy" cake (as he fondly calls it). So that yummy guy is baked, cooling, and ready for frosting.
... now, I am fiddle-faddling online. Muhaha.
... well, now I hear Olive cooing in her chair..... should probably get her, hmm?
Stay tuned for: Emili will be a doula sooner rather than later. It's been "re-front-burner-ized."
Saturday, May 21, 2011
church nursery
Reaching in for some booty. 
Consequently, those shoes are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too big on him yet (they were Elijah's)
This is *seriously* the face I got when I said "Elijah, smile!" What a goose.Thursday, May 19, 2011
link-crazy
I have been bookmarking articles and blogs like a mad-woman. And in case anyone out there is interested, I thought I'd share.
Things on....
Breastfeeding
http://www.drmomma.org/2011/02/joy-of-nursing-toddlers-photo-gallery.html
http://www.phdinparenting.com/2010/05/14/50-reasons-for-breastfeeding-anytime-anywhere/?sms_ss=facebook&at_xt=4dd2a536559812d1%2C0
Birthing
http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1311580/ode-to-midwifery-stories-and-images-celebrating-the-midwives-we-love
http://www.anktangle.com/2011/05/birth-works-on-meeting-ina-may-gaskin.html
Child-rearing
http://www.kellynaturally.com/post/If-Not-Spanking-Then-What.aspx
http://www.anktangle.com/2011/01/traveling-with-cloth-diapers.html
Education for the kiddos
http://www.montessoriforeveryone.com/Cultural-Materials_ep_61-1.html
http://www.aholyexperience.com/2011/05/pros-cons-homeschooling-christian-educatio/
Fun things for mama
http://www.poorgirleatswell.com/2011/05/recipe-red-quinoa-spring-herb-tabbouleh.html
Things on....
Breastfeeding
http://www.drmomma.org/2011/02/joy-of-nursing-toddlers-photo-gallery.html
http://www.phdinparenting.com/2010/05/14/50-reasons-for-breastfeeding-anytime-anywhere/?sms_ss=facebook&at_xt=4dd2a536559812d1%2C0
Birthing
http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1311580/ode-to-midwifery-stories-and-images-celebrating-the-midwives-we-love
http://www.anktangle.com/2011/05/birth-works-on-meeting-ina-may-gaskin.html
Child-rearing
http://www.kellynaturally.com/post/If-Not-Spanking-Then-What.aspx
http://www.anktangle.com/2011/01/traveling-with-cloth-diapers.html
Education for the kiddos
http://www.montessoriforeveryone.com/Cultural-Materials_ep_61-1.html
http://www.aholyexperience.com/2011/05/pros-cons-homeschooling-christian-educatio/
Fun things for mama
http://www.poorgirleatswell.com/2011/05/recipe-red-quinoa-spring-herb-tabbouleh.html
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)